Growing

I Make My Own Righteousness

holyandhappy.com
  • When social media comments define your self-worth – this post is for you.
  • When you feel whole after your To Do list is done – this post is for you.
  • When you start elevating yourself above others – this post is for you.
  • When life feels like it’s falling apart when you couldn’t meet self-imposed expectations – this post is for you.
  • When you start apologizing for everything you do – this post is for you.

I couldn’t put my finger on it, but I had a feeling something was wrong whenever I ended my day in bliss knowing that everything on my list was done and the day could be officially checked off as productive.

On the surface, nothing is wrong with this. Who doesn’t love a juicy, effective day where your efficiency is off the charts and the traffic lights are all in your favor?!

Oh, but curse the days that end up far opposite of this! All the frowning faces and all the pouting ensues and I find myself a hot mess over an unorganized day. I start questioning what I’m even doing with my life and is Brad going to be disappointed that I only accomplished one out of the five tasks I had planned for that day?!
(btw-Brad never acts like this)

God was ruffling my heart’s feathers for a reason and He was faithful to identify the problem. I’ve been turning myself into a righteousness factory. A self-producing perfectionist with only one option to live in life-perfectly productive.

You may not have the need to feel perfect. Bless you.
But there’s something, according to YOU, that deems YOU O.K.

On the days where I think I did everything awesome, loved people well, kept everyone happy, got all the lists done – I didn’t need the Gospel. I created my own perfect record for the day with the “Kirstin stamp of approval” and desperately hoped the next day- shoot, the rest of my life would go just as well as this day.

And this is where my Dad chimes in and says, “We live in a fallen world, sweetie.”

So the perfect record is going to crash and burn. Although, that perfect record was never perfect in the first place. I’m settling for my own self-righteousness over the l-i-t-e-r-a-l perfect and holy record of Jesus Christ that was freely given to me.

So really there’s two problems we’re dealing with here:

  1. Substituting the Gospel with my own righteousness
  2. Being satisfied with too little-producing my own happiness based on life circumstances

Enter the famous quote from CS Lewis:

“If we consider the unblushing promises of reward and the staggering nature of the rewards promised in the Gospels, it would seem that Our Lord finds our desires not too strong, but too weak…We are far too easily pleased.”

These days, I’ve found myself content with producing my own righteousness over the gracious, loving record of Jesus Christ that deems me the daughter of Creator of the universe.

And this is sinful.

This habit, this contentment needs to be killed. Because on the days that my self-perfection doesn’t measure up to what’s truly required of me as a Christian, I fall apart. And this doesn’t have to happen!!

“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. All this is from God, who through Christ reconciled us to himself and gave us the ministry of reconciliation; that is, in Christ.”
– 2 Corinthians 5:17-18

“For Christ also suffered once for sins, the righteous for the unrighteous, that he might bring us to God” – 1Peter 3:18

Where are you deeming yourself worthy in life? How is that substituting the Gospel?